Where Are You “Singing Alone?”

December 11, 2022 | Bill, Seth Godin, and Terri Tomoff meetup

“If you’re not prepared to sing alone, it’s difficult to get to the point where people sing along with you.”

Seth Godin’s blog – February 8, 2023

Seth Godin closed this morning’s blog with the above quote. His encouragement for us all to be willing to “sing” alone is a reminder we all need – if we are going to make a contribution and difference in our world.

https://seths.blog/2023/02/the-audacity-of-the-crowd-anthem/

Over the years, my most grateful takeaway from Seth’s work is his emphasis that the ability to “choose yourself” has never been easier thanks to technology. When you choose yourself, you are willing to go forward alone and believe in, or trust, your own vision. Metaphorically, when you choose yourself, you are stepping out and willing to “sing alone.”

Personally and professionally, my life’s joy, contentment, and success have resulted from advantages accrued through a willingness to go alone and stay the course for the long term when my heart believed in what I was doing. The willingness to go forward day after day without seeking affirmation is a compelling strength that I have enjoyed. As the benefits of “singing alone” started to compound, the desire to go down the less traveled path became a fabric of my lifestyle.

When you travel alone in your interests, you eventually discover others who share the same mindset, and your tribe slowly grows. To celebrate the small, caring community of a small tribe, my twin Don and I created the “Virtually No One Community” (thanks to Seth’s blog of January 2, 2023) to celebrate those of us who, in the macro view, stand alone in our work and the value we bring to the world. We all possess unique interests and talents that virtually no one has – unfortunately, too often, we suppress our true selves in the interest of fitting in and being like others. How tragic to live a life seeking to fit in and not allow our individual uniqueness to shine and help others!

A few examples of “singing alone” in my life include:

  1. Dedication to my love of distance running and being a competitive runner for over ten years. Competitive distance running is often a lonely road that requires sacrifices few would be willing to make.
  2. Events of fate will require that we “sing” alone. The fact is that we are required to adapt to external events of which we have no choice. Two notable moments of fate in my life include being born as a twin (brother Don – which has been a blessing that is impossible to convey) and the 1996 diagnosis of my two-year-old son, Ryan, with childhood cancer (ALL – Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia) that thrust our family’s life into inexplicable chaos from that day forward. See the memoir by my wife, Terri, titled The Focused Fight: A Childhood Cancer Journey: From Mayhem to Miracles.
  3. Professionally, twin Don and I developed and challenged our thinking non-stop throughout our careers in accounting and business. Through our early adopter mindset around technology, we have repeatedly gained a disproportionate advantage allowing us to make exceptional contributions and help others in our careers.
  4. My perspective of an abundance mindset, dedication to personal development, kindness, and gratitude, has enabled me to continually grow and lift my spirits and the spirits of others.
  5. In March 2018, I co-founded #TwinzTalk with Don to share tips for encouragement and personal development via social media. “Changing the world, one interaction, one person, at a time.”
  6. In June 2020, Terri and I joined the Akimbo Writing In Community (WIC) initiative. I now consider myself a writer, and my daily process of showing up to write is a gift I treasure.

Where are you singing alone?

Introducing Brainstorm Road – Community of Practice!

https://vimeo.com/788345059
What is Brainstorm Road?

It is exciting to hear of the introduction of the Brainstorm Road initiative that is coming in March 2023, led by Kristin Hatcher (Founder of Writing in Community) and Margo Aaron, with the support of Seth Godin.

Brainstorm Road is a new “community of practice” available after the current WIC session ends. Akimbo is not going forward with the WIC initiative, and Brainstorm Road appears to be an exciting new initiative! Terri and I were excited to see the recent update and the introduction to the concept on the website.

The idea of Brainstorm Road is to bring together a community of people interested in “leveling up” (as Seth would encourage) to ship their work to the world. Beyond the current mission of writing in community, BR is adopting a more expanded approach to help those who have a creative dream and would like support to hit a “finish line” with a plan they might be holding inside them. The introduction website notes:

“It’s not online learning. It’s online practice.”

“Finish your novel, launch your podcast, publish your website”

“Brainstorm Road is a community of practice organized around a weekly shipping commitment.”

I will join the community excited to hear about the dreams that participants plan to accomplish. WIC profoundly changed Terri and me – our writing adventure has taken many paths over the last 2 and 1/2 years – and we look forward to continuing to be inspired by others, helping others, and creating work that we might not even realize yet! This six-month program is the start of an exciting new adventure!

Take the time to watch the 11-minute video discussion What is Brainstorm Road, between Seth, Kristin, and Margo, to learn more. Then sign up to be on the waitlist for the March 2023 launch. You and the world need your work!

The “Virtually No One” Community – Join the Initiative!

Inspired by Seth Godin’s blog posted on January 2, 2023, my twin Don and I are starting the “Virtually No One” community. This community is for people who personally and professionally take “the road less traveled” and, in the long run, are making a compelling difference for themselves and their world.

Virtually no one is enough. Our lives and this community are committed to believing that a small act, thinking differently, and using our talents to solve problems, one individual does make a difference. We trust this to the core as we have seen proof throughout our lives and careers that our early adopter mindset, combined with a vision of potential, has exponentially rewarded, over and over. We know our beliefs and actions are “changing the world, one interaction, one person, at a time.”

Seth’s blog notes:

“Compared to the overall population, virtually no one built Wikipedia, virtually no one voted for that senator and virtually no one starts a business. Virtually no one cares enough to help a stranger in need, and virtually no one leads the way.

And that’s okay.

Because virtually no one is enough.

When we “see” the potential of thinking and working differently, the space is lonely and only persistence, and long-term dedication provides hope for progress (for example – consider the Slack collaboration tool introduced in 2016 – highly resisted in its early days, but now ubiquitous along with Microsoft Teams, in today’s world). The payoffs when the idea succeeds are very gratifying. To be clear, failures frequently occur, causing many to say, “I knew that wouldn’t work.” Because of the fact that failures do occur, and many folks will not move ahead (late adopters) without convincing definitive proof of success, virtually no one is willing to walk the path.

A few quotes of inspiration:

“Don’t worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you’ll have to ram them down people’s throats.” –Howard Aiken

Steve Jobs “Crazy Ones” Quote:

“Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes… The ones who see things differently – they’re not fond of rules. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the one thing you can’t do is ignore them, because they change things… Because the ones who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do. Think different.”

In all our actions, we think of helping others and helping the communities in which we live and work. Commit to personal development/self-improvement and lean on your talents to help others. Do what is right in your heart, and do not strive to “fit in” with the masses. To fit in is doing our genuine selves a disservice. We all are meant to and have so much potential to significantly contribute to the world with our unique talents.

A few examples of virtually no one community members:

  1. Don made a trip to Costco Wholesale recently and noted many stray carts in the parking lot. Case in point, virtually no one (other than an employee of Costco) will take the time to collect and return several carts to the appropriate stations and out of the vehicle’s harm’s way.
  2. How about picking up trash in our communities? Again, welcome to the virtually no one community!
  3. My wife Terri published a memoir of our son Ryan’s 5x cancer battles (The Focused Fight). Well, virtually no one writes a book.

Let’s get active and dedicate our talents and energy to making a positive contribution – in ways and areas where virtually no one, unfortunately, is paying attention. Join us, shine the light, and share your stories!

December 31, 2022 – Don Tomoff at Costco Warehouse – shopping carts assistance
July 24, 2021 – Ryan and Terri Tomoff at The Focused Fight Book Launch

Study More to Understand That You Know Little

Study 📚 more. #TwinzTalk tip #924

Morning reading and topic of discussion this past weekend for Don Tomoff, MBA, and me. Always be learning – and be willing to leverage the #superpower of admitting “I don’t know.”

“𝘼 𝙨𝙖𝙜𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙛𝙧𝙖𝙞𝙙 𝙤𝙛 𝙡𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙤𝙛 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬𝙡𝙚𝙙𝙜𝙚: 𝙝𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙛𝙧𝙖𝙞𝙙 𝙤𝙛 𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙞𝙩𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝙤𝙧 𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙙 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙠, 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙝𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙖𝙛𝙧𝙖𝙞𝙙 𝙤𝙛 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜—𝙩𝙤 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙝 𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙤𝙚𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬.

𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙙𝙮 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚.”

—𝙈𝙄𝘾𝙃𝙀𝙇 𝘿𝙀 𝙈𝙊𝙉𝙏𝘼𝙄𝙂𝙉𝙀

#alwayslearning#personaldevelopment#professionaldevelopment#learning#study#quote#mondaymotivation

Value Sharing – “Financial Stability”

Recently I read Brene Brown’s book “Dare to Lead” and she referenced a discussion with her company CFO, and the importance of “financial stability.” This resonated with me, and I believe financial stability is a value that I have carried personally and professionally, my entire life. When Brene discussed the topic, she articulated it so well that I thought, “this is me!”

“Another example of how value sharing strengthened a relationship was with my friend Chaz. To be honest, we’ve known each other for so long, I wasn’t sure that any more connecting was possible. But when he left his job as CF0 at a very successful ad agency to come work with me, there were some difficult shifts. During our values exercise, I learned that one of his values is financial stability. Now, you’re probably thinking, That makes sense—he’s your CFO and one of your closest confidants. But honestly, I had no idea. And when I wanted to take big risks or make large investments in new businesses, I made up the story that he was pushing back and asking a million questions because he didn’t trust me, or because he thought his job was to talk me out of stuff. When I learned that it was his value—not just his job—I wanted to cry. In that moment it became one of my favorite things about him. I trust him so much I could cry just writing about this. We don’t fully see people until we know their values.”

Brene Brown, book “Dare to Lead”
Bill with Brene Brown book “Dare to Lead”

I now realize that financial stability is clearly a VALUE of mine that runs to my core. This is not just a “nice to have,” but rather is a key part of the fabric of who I am as a person and professional.

Growing up, in a household with 8 siblings, we all learned early on the importance of hard work to achieve goals. We all earned whatever spending money we had, and while our core needs were met, family vacations and trips were not part of the family routine. We all grew up fiercely independent, and I have argued later in life, that this was to a fault.

“People need people.” A favorite quote of mine is

“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.”

–African Proverb

 

When our father passed away in 1974, my sophomore year in high school, hard work and making our dreams come true was squarely on our shoulders. Even when we did not “know” what those dreams were. To this day, I have always taken great pride in earning what I have in life. I stress this personally and professionally, thankful for opportunities, and am always committed to “leaving it all on the field” relative to giving my best effort at every endeavor I chose to pursue. These efforts translated into my running career, college academics, personal growth and development, and work efforts to earn money and save for college.

Personal finance has always been a strong interest of mine. How do I protect assets and provide for my family, over the long haul? The personality that I brought to the family was one of austerity, while truly believing we were “living the dream.” Core practices include living beneath means, saving relentlessly for the future, 401(k) saving contributions were always given the highest priority, steady work to assess and reduce spending, refuse to take a home mortgage beyond 15 years, refuse to carry credit card debt, and drive cars for many many years, as reliability allowed. A consistent mindset of make the most of what we have, and treasure what we have.

In 1996, when my son Ryan was diagnosed with Leukemia, the need for full-time employment, insurance coverage and concern about financial demands of our family life and Ryan’s health out-of-pocket costs, created intense focus on managing our financial resources. Desperate to survive, cash was protected wherever possible, and this again drove back to my concern for financial stability. The reality is that treatment costs, employment stability, etc. amount to stresses that unfortunately can bankrupt families who are forced to travel the childhood cancer road. My family has been blessed with emotional and financial support that helped us survive the journey to today. Today, Ryan is a five time cancer survivor, and we are living our lives concerned for his future and financial needs he will face. Yet, we are so blessed, and treasure each day that is gifted to us, as a family with both our daughter Olivia and son Ryan.

During my business career, I grew to understand and embrace the importance of financial stability and the need for a strong balance sheet and cash position. As Abe Pollin, Washington Sports & Entertainment owner, once said to me, “cash is king.” I had always, inherently, felt this way, but now Mr. Pollin was emphasizing it from the perspective of the survival of his business world. This thought is embraced to this day, and one that I take very seriously. In my job responsibilities as CFO with InstallNET International, my concern for the organization cash position and building up the financial strength of the balance sheet, was a part of my “fabric” of who I was. This revelation really hit home when reading Brene Brown’s book! It turns out that a career in accounting was perfectly suited to the demeanor of the person who I was. That connection never was fully noted, in my case, and it was gratifying to see the value of financial stability so perfectly articulated.

Share Your Thoughts! Exposure = Awareness = Leverage

Over the last five years, my interest in social media has evolved and I have become a huge fan of the power and potential of social engagement. The ability to learn, and connect, with others has impacted me in incredible ways. People that I may never meet in person, provide insight and thought provoking content that is invaluable and enables me to continually develop my interests personally and professionally.

Thanks to the kindness and generosity of so many that share their thoughts and expertise with the world, I commit to challenging myself every day to help others and continually pay it forward. In person, and online, I have found that the world is full of people that genuinely care about adding value for others…with no expectations. Selfishly, I do hope that others will share content with the hope that their followers may enjoy value and pass along in their world!

I recently watched an excellent video from Robbie Abed where he talked about the impact Gary Vaynerchuk had on him. The discussion was around that observation that Gary is often asked about the business ROI of his video content for the #AskGaryVee Show. Robbie’s discussion in this 7 minute video elaborates on an excellent observation of Gary’s that “exposure = leverage”. Enjoy!

Coffee With Robbie – Gary V. Exposure = Leverage

Gary V. full thoughts on the business value of the #AskGaryVee Show are worth reading:

The Business Model Behind The #AskGaryVee Show

If you have not seen the #AskGaryVee Show, I encourage you to check it out! I have been watching for quite a while, and find it informative, entertaining, and fun yet serious points are made. Linked below is one of my all-time favorite episodes.

#AskGaryVee Episode 127: What Keeps Good Bosses From Becoming Great Bosses?

Full disclosure – I was so happy with the free content Gary provides in the #AskGaryVee Show that I have now purchased and read all 4 of his bestselling books. As he would say, provide so much value that you “earn the ask”!

Please share YOUR thoughts, expertise, and passion with the world. I trust you will find that Robbie and Gary are spot on…indeed, exposure = leverage! For my purposes, the phrase that resonates with me is “Exposure = Awareness = Leverage“. As you provide value genuinely and consistently, exposure will occur and develop into awareness for those consuming your content. Ultimately, awareness WILL create leverage for you in many ways that cannot be anticipated! Good luck!

 

My Journey of 100 TED Talks

#JourneyOf100TED

In years past, I would occasionally watch TED Talks. In July 2015, this changed after reading an article about Erin Freschi in California. She adopted a practice of watching a TED Talk each night with her 8 year-old son. To read the article: TED Before Bed: One mother’s nightly ritual with her son.

The idea of watching a steady stream of TED Talks resonated with me, and I committed to watch 100 talks. This is referred to as my “Journey to 100 TED Talks” and little did I know the impact this process would have on me! The journey started on July 15, 2015 and completed June 19, 2016! While the challenge has been completed, I am inspired, and have continued the journey. As of this writing, the count is 122 talks watched. For more information on the TED Talks organization, check out About TED Talks.

As I started my journey, one rule was that the talk had to be watched completely from start to finish. The quality of most talks was amazing and I honestly picked up something from every talk I chose to watch. By committing to watch a talk completely, I found that I became more open to other viewpoints and my overall perspective evolved to be a bit more “rounded”. One early talk that was difficult for me was Amanda Palmer’s “The Art of Asking” but I now look back on that talk as the kick-off to exposing myself to topics and knowledge that previously would not have interested me. See link below for Amanda’s talk.

Though not all-inclusive, five speakers who were especially enjoyable for me included:

  • Brene’ Brown
  • Dan Gilbert
  • Seth Godin
  • Sir Ken Robinson
  • Simon Sinek

In future posts (follow Twitter @btomoffCPA), individual talks will be shared in greater depth. Below are a sample of talks that I really enjoyed:

  • Susan Cain: The power of introverts

  • Angela Lee Duckworth: The power of passion and perseverance

  • Daniel Gilbert: The surprising science of happiness

  • Seth Godin: Stop stealing dreams

  • Amanda Palmer: The art of asking

  • Dan Pink: The puzzle of motivation

  • Ken Robinson: Do schools kill creativity

  • Barry Schwartz: The paradox of choice

  • Simon Sinek: How great leaders inspire action

I urge you to create your own individual journey of TED Talks. Via Twitter, please provide any additional talks that impact you and let’s share the power of growth and perspective to be gained through TED Talks!

This was originally posted July 24, 2016 to my Medium blog.